Showing posts with label Australia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Australia. Show all posts

Wednesday, 15 August 2018

A Thousand Perfect Notes by C.G Drews: Book Review

An emotionally charged story of music, abuse and, ultimately, hope.


Beck hates his life. He hates his violent mother. He hates his home. Most of all, he hates the piano that his mother forces him to play hour after hour, day after day. He will never play as she did before illness ended her career and left her bitter and broken. But Beck is too scared to stand up to his mother, and tell her his true passion, which is composing his own music - because the least suggestion of rebellion on his part ends in violence.


When Beck meets August, a girl full of life, energy and laughter, love begins to awaken within him and he glimpses a way to escape his painful existence. But dare he reach for it?

SPOILER FREE REVIEW
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You know how contemporary novels are usually best read in Summer, or so I've come to discover? Well, this novel was probably the first I've read around Winter time that really broke free from that typical habit - the mood, the setting, and the overall feel of sad music humming beautifully in the back of your head as you imagine the soundtrack to Beck's life (that is exactly what I did BTW and the playlist will be at the bottom of this review). As sad as I am to say, this did touch on family abuse, physical and emotional - two subject of which are touchy for me personally but C.G Drews (A.K.A Paper Fury) was able to initiate it in a way that didn't have to use violence to fight back. I feel like it's hard to really say whether this book could prove a point for those suffering through similar circumstances, because then others would say that it is wrong to use books or fictional characters' lives as examples of what we must do ourselves. However, personally I do feel like Beck's ability to avoid physical conflict in the best way that he could was truly amendable and I really felt that it was exactly what the book needed to stand out against all others where only violence solves issues.

“He floods the house with music that shook the world a hundred years ago. His fingers knot over complicated patterns and his thumbs fail when he needs them most. But, the Maestro's wrath aside, he owes it to the music to find perfection.”

Beck's life is somewhat unrealistic to a lot of people - I can believe it, however, as my own life could seem pretty unrealistic to others who don't think emotional or physical abuse could really something that some parents are capable of. It's true, and very very damaging to children who grow up to be adults trying to navigate the world in their own ways, constantly being judged by others who don't understand their lingering pain. His sister, Joey, is stuck in the middle of him, his piano, and their mother who is hell bent on making Beck a prodigy, better that she ever was. August is the free-spirited girl who sees passion and love under the shield that Beck keeps up to try keep her away as having friends is just a "distraction" to his career. She slowly breaks through his walls and tempts him with strange cake and catchy alternative music that he's never had a chance to hear because of the years he's been subjected to listening to and practicing purely classical music.





Because this was such a quick read, I don't want to say too much about the storyline or the characters because there aren't too many of those either, but I'd like to state that this book resonated a lot with me personally. Being able to connect with Beck in an emotional way that transcends the barriers of a normal life reminds me of how moving fictional stories can be when they're meant to shake the core of your being. This story shows the passion of a talented soul who is controlled to become something that he is not instead of creating something new and beautiful. It is a sacrifice to safe others from stepping into harms way. It's showing that beauty and love exists in the strangest of places, and that there isn't always a selfish reason to care. If I'm going to ask anyone to read this, it's because I think it brings up important messages that people need to hear, and also because this is a reality for many kids around the world and it's time that they had their story told.

“The world is a broken mirror, each shard reflecting his terrified face.”

I have given this book a 4.75 out of 5 stars for evoking such emotions that will scar me for life but also remind me what it means to be passionate and fight for what is right. I've read books that have changed my life and made me feel all the feelings I could have felt, but never have I read a book like this that has made me feel truly moved, that has made me want to do something about fighting for people like this who need help. To raise awareness for people who suffer through depression or muteness or domestic violence, or damaging anger. A truly astounding debut from C.G. Drews (PaperFury) and I cannot wait to see what she will bring out next - I'm aching for the next instalment and her brand new project! Bring them on 2019!







Thank you Hachette NZ for the review copy

Like and follow their links here:

Official Website: hachette.co.nz


Go add A Thousand Perfect Notes to your Goodreads list HERE

Go buy it on MightyApe with 1 day delivery in New Zealand HERE
Buy it on Book Depository with free shipping world wide HERE
Find it on the Hachette NZ website HERE


Wednesday, 4 October 2017

A Semi-Definitive List of Worst Nightmares by Krystal Sutherland: Book Review



Ever since Esther Solar's grandfather was cursed by Death, everyone in her family has been doomed to suffer one great fear in their lifetime. Esther's father is agoraphobic and hasn't left the basement in six years, her twin brother can t be in the dark without a light on, and her mother is terrified of bad luck.



The Solars are consumed by their fears and, according to the legend of the curse, destined to die from them. 

Esther doesn't know what her great fear is yet (nor does she want to), a feat achieved by avoiding pretty much everything. Elevators, small spaces, and crowds are all off-limits. So are haircuts, spiders, dolls, mirrors and three dozen other phobias she keeps a record of in her semi-definitive list of worst nightmares. 

Then Esther is pickpocketed by Jonah Smallwood, an old elementary school classmate. Along with her phone, money and a fruit roll-up she d been saving, Jonah also steals her list of fears. Despite the theft, Esther and Jonah become friends, and he sets a challenge for them: in an effort to break the curse that has crippled her family, they will meet every Sunday of senior year to work their way through the list, facing one terrifying fear at a time, including one that Esther hadn't counted on: love.

SPOILER FREE REVIEW
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*Trigger warnings for anxiety, depression, and cutting*




“Anxiety felt like a grapnel anchor had been pickaxed into your back, one prong in each lung, one through the heart, one through the spine, the weight curving your posture forward, dragging you down to the murky depths of the sea floor. The good news was that you kind of got used to it after a while. Got used to the gasping, brink-of-heart-attack feeling that followed you everywhere. All you had to do was grab one of the prongs that stuck out from the bottom of your sternum, give it a little shake, and say, “Listen, asshole. We’re not dying. We have shit to do.”


It feels like a century since I had last found something which really resonated with all the internal struggles and pain that I've had to suffer throughout my whole life. A Semi-Definitive List Of Worst Nightmares encaptures the whole package deal that comes with the curse of anxiety and depression. I found myself relating to almost every second sentence and had originally sat down to read at least half of the novel two days before it was due for release - I feel terrible that I was not able to complete it sooner and have one heck of a review waiting for everyone to read and hear my thoughts on. However I'm glad I was able to spend the month returning every now and then to get a fix of a beautifully truthful and empowering novel. One thing that just made me instantly love this book as much as the actual content was the fact that Esther is a natural red-head with an array of freckles on her face, and Jonah basically resembles Finn from Star Wars: The Force Awakens almost exactly and I am so glad I was given that visual because that is exactly how I pictured him for the rest of the novel!

This shot that I posted to my Instagram story could not be more accurate!


Esther Solar is introduced to us vividly in the first few pages along with a few vital pieces of information:

  1. Her family is cursed with developing unhealthy phobias which prevent them from being anything but a normal human being. 
  2. She dresses in a spontaneous costume every day - on this particular day/night she is dressed as Red Riding Hood. 
  3. Her mother, Rosemary, is afraid of bad luck, her father, Peter, is an agoraphobe and has lived in the basement for six years since his sudden confinement, and her brother, Eugene, is afraid of the darkness and and anything related to it. 
  4. She is super gullible and too kind for her own good. 
  5. She protested Dumbledore's death as a child for a week before the movie came out, even though the books were written years prior to the movie release. (She is a sweet little cinnamon roll!) 
  6. We basically need to keep reading to find out why the hell Esther would somehow eventually fall in love with Jonah Smallwood - the guy who robs her of her grandmother's bracelet, iPhone, Fruit Roll-Up, library card, copy of The Godfather, her semi-definitive list of worst nightmares, AND her diginity, all within the time-frame of four minutes in a bus stop at night. (Trust me when I say that you will enjoy the hell out of these two characters together!)

If I am going to give an accurate review of this book, I'll have to point out how important the topics discussed in this novel are and why many of the creative analogies such as The Man Who Was Death, the curse on the family, and Esther's interpretation on the way love works backwards, all have deeper meanings that we might realise. I have taken photos of particular quotes that I resonated with personally and also felt like they needed a bit of recognition.







The hard truth with mental illnesses and disabilities, but it doesn't mean that everyone does. I just felt like this was a 'in the moment' quote that I could relate to a lot. People have given up on me before, but then there are people who haven't given up on me. Chad is a great example of someone who has stayed with me for four years, even though I have ADHD, anxiety/panic disorder, and an unknown joint disease that gives me pain on a daily basis and has rendered my legs useless multiple times before. I am forever grateful for him ❤

Jonah is the love interest/semi-hero that every other novel needs (and every person that needs a little push towards confidence and self love); the type of person that would take your deepest fears and throw them at you lovingly, all the while knowing very well (sorta) that you won't actually die if you face them. He is the one who gives Esther a reason to live - in saying that, she is not suicidal, she just doesn't live a very interesting life before she bands up with Jonah to face her fears every Sunday of the week until she reaches number fifty and finds out what she's really afraid of. I have to say that this book has truly inspired me to live my life no matter the fears that I face when I start to think about the real world. I honestly felt like I was living an adventure that was exhilarating and eye-opening at the same time. I was reminded that mental illness can almost feel like a curse and death can feel like a person that is just hanging around in the shadows waiting for you to say the okay, yet at the same time you can also tell them to just f**k off.

The caption on the photo is the only one that is needed.

If this book has taught me anything, it is to know that anxiety and depression will always be a tough fight, but it is possible to come out the other side eventually. There is no instant cure but it can be managed and it is important to remember that there are many other people who suffer from the same things, if not many other mental illnesses, as well. We're not alone in the world - we can choose to either let the pain subdue us or we can choose to rage a war against the darkness and make life something worth living, even if it means facing a few fears to find the light.

I've decided to present my own list of fears so that I might inspire someone else to do the same and show that we are not all invincible but we are all human (I do believe some of us are magical shapeshifting unicorns but that is besides the point).

Things that terrify me on a daily basis:


  1. Loosing someone I love.
  2. Heights.
  3. Blood and anything to do with surgery or cut open skin. (UGH!)
  4. Crossing busy roads. (I used to have panic attacks every morning walking to school)
  5.  Depression creeping back up on me when I least expect it.
  6. Panic attacks.
  7. Wasps and hornets. (I have more faith that bees aren't a****les)
  8. Not knowing what is wrong with me. (Currently going through this crisis)
  9. I might die before I get the chance to accomplish my dream of becoming a best selling author and inspire others with my stories of struggle.
  10. Living in a city surrounded by volcanoes that are due to erupt with 1.3 million people who may or may not care.
  11. The possibility that my current life is really just a very long dream and I will wake up from a coma to a life I never wanted.
  12. Loosing both my voice and my hearing. (Both are my sources of music which keep my depression at bay. See no. 5*)
  13. New Zealand is a tiny country/island that could sink just like Hawai'ki did centuries ago. (I'm a big believer of Maori legends. Don't judge me!)
  14. Donald Trump ruling the most powerful country in the world.
  15. Racism. (It terrifies me because I've seen people be killed just because they're dark skinned and I have panic attacks thinking about loosing my partner, Chad, my daughter, Zoey, my brother, Devontaye, or anyone that I love just because their skin is darker)
  16. WETAS! THEY ALL DESERVE TO DIE! (For those who don't know, they are a native species to New Zealand and are literally spawns of the devil. They are super hard to kill–I used a whole fly spray can and tried squashing one to no avail–and they make me sick!) I dare you to search the name on Google Images.
One fear I used to have but don't anymore?: I can take a photo with no makeup on and feel confident about it! Even if there is a book in front of my face in this one. Baby steps, guys. Baby steps.


I have given this novel 5 out of 5 stars because I have never read a book in my life that I have related to so much (Twilight doesn't count right now, okay?) and felt like it deserves a place on the modern classics table for future generations to study in school and refer to for inspirational quotes when life feels overwhelming and sometimes like nothing at all. Krystal Sutherland has definitely done everyone a huge service by writing such a beautiful story which will always stay close to our hearts. I will go to the ends of the earth to make sure this book does not become underrated in the bookish community. We need more relatable stories like this (as I've probably stated many times before) because so many people like myself need them when we're at our worst to sit down with and feel like we have a chance to be revived. I sat down a couple of weeks ago when I was drowning in stress and tears, and having Esther and Jonah to comfort my fears by facing their own gave me so much strength that I managed to avoid a panic attack. I ended up having one a few days later anyway but somehow I felt a little more hopeful afterwards when I reminded myself that so many people suffered the same way as me even for the simplest things like being in the presence of frogs, corn fields, or lobsters.

Krystal got all the nostalgic feels perfectly - I love little details like this one!


Thanks to A Semi-Definitive List Of Worst Nightmares, I am super keen to read Krystal's first novel, Our Chemical Hearts and fall in love with her writing all over again. I've always been interested in dipping into the genre of contemporary with my writing, so maybe Krystal's books will be the reason I run head first into action - no fear, no pain, just love, passion, and novels of inspiration.




Check out my Spotify playlist for

✮A Semi-Definitive List Of Worst Nightmares!✮



Thank you Penguin Random House NZ for the review copy!


Like and follow their links here:

Official Website: http://penguin.co.nz/



Please contact any one of these helplines if you need help:

• LIFELINE: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7)
• SUICIDE CRISIS HELPLINE: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7)
• YOUTHLINE: 0800 376 633
• NEED TO TALK? Free call or text 1737 (available 24/7)
• KIDSLINE: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7)
• WHATSUP: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm)
• DEPRESSION HELPLINE: 0800 111 757



Are you suffering with a mental illness such as depression or anxiety? Here are some helpful links from BetterHelp that you can check out and find tips on how to live a happier life:

BetterHelp Advice - Anxiety
BetterHelp Advice - Depression
How To Deal with Depression: Tips, Techniques And Finding the Right Treatment

How Do I Find A Therapist Near Me?



Go add A Semi-Definitive List of Worst Nightmares to your Goodreads list HERE


Go buy it on MightyApe with 1 day delivery in New Zealand HERE

Buy it on Book Depository with free shipping world wide HERE

Find it on the Penguin Random House NZ website HERE




Please consider donating a small tip so that I may be able to continue doing what I love! I am currently studying but I would love to be a stay-at-home mum and make a living through my blogging and BookTubing - I will do the best I can to provide top quality content that is interesting and worthy of your subscription ❤




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Snapchat: FeathersnFaith

Monday, 19 October 2015

The Anti Cool Girl by Rosie Waterland: Book Review



Brutal, brave, hilarious - a full-frontal memoir about surviving the very worst that life can throw at you.

Rosie Waterland has never been cool. Growing up in housing commission, Rosie was cursed with a near perfect, beautiful older sister who dressed like Mariah Carey on a Best & Less budget while Rosie was still struggling with various toilet mishaps. She soon realised that she was the Doug Pitt to her sister's Brad, and that cool was not going to be her currency in this life.

But that was only one of the problems Rosie faced. With two addicts for parents, she grew up amidst rehab stays, AA meetings, overdoses, narrow escapes from drug dealers and a merry-go-round of dodgy boyfriends in her mother's life. Rosie watched as her dad passed out/was arrested/vomited, and had to talk her mum out of killing herself.

As an adult, trying to come to grips with her less than conventional childhood, Rosie navigated her way through eating disorders, nude acting roles, mental health issues and awkward Tinder dates. Then she had an epiphany: to stop pretending to be who she wasn't and embrace her true self - a girl who loved drinking wine in her underpants on Sunday nights - and become an Anti-Cool Girl.

SPOILER FREE REVIEW
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Well holy moly, I might have just found the woman who has completely inspired me to write my own memoir. I tell you now people, that this book is not for the faint hearted or the easily offended. Rosie Waterland is an exceptional writer and portrays her long struggle with life growing up with a poor family living through state housing and eventually being thrown into the fostering system before barely turning ten, along with a lot more heart breaking and relatable (if you have gone through a similar bringing up) moments which will stick with you long after you close the book for the last time. This is the first memoir that I've read which I can highly relate to and one which actually made me laugh out loud, making my partner think I was on drugs or that I was messed up when I showed him the part about when Rosie was a kid, masturbating while watching (or not watching) Rugrats. Yeah that got me at first too, but later on as I became more and more acquainted with Rosie's grotesque humor I decided I really did enjoy reading about all these crazy moments in her life which basically led up to her becoming an "Anti Cool Girl".

So first of, I really want to say: Rosie, if I ever get the chance to meet you in person I am literally going to give you the biggest hug. I may not have gone through the exact same circumstances but I know exactly what it's like to feel like the kid who doesn't feel loved enough, cool enough or good enough for anyone. I know what it's like to have an alcoholic mother and have multiple step-fathers. I know what it's like to feel embarrassed for doing something stupid or having nights where sometimes you don't think your parents will ever come home. Life is tough and there are sadly too many people in the world that have to suffer through their childhood due to the bad choices their parents make and sometimes it's too hard for their parents to get help or even be helped. Reading this book almost became a trigger for me. It's hard reading something that you relate to so much or at least have a major understanding of without thinking about everything you went through too and coming away from it with a tear-free face. There were multiple moments where I just had to look up and remind myself that I was here, I was okay and that nothing like this would ever  happen again. I feel for Rosie because she seemed to soldier through all the painful things in her life and even as a grown adult, she still felt the pressure of life and how society can still be a bitch, even after school. If you think that your family is a little f**ked up, then meet Rosie's family. No, it doesn't mean she's a terrible person, it just means that she has had to go through a lot of shit in her life which she didn't deserve but came out a stronger person because of it - basically giving the definition of this book.

If Rosie were to ever write a fictional novel whether it be young adult, new adult or adult fiction, I would most definitely read it. She has this crazy humor about her which has lead to her imminent success and even through such an emotional, heart-breaking memoir, is still able to shine through her not-so-glamorous moments by making fun of herself and taking a joke on all the embarrassing things that happened to her as a kid. I'm not sure I would be ready to now, but Rosie has definitely inspired me to one day write about my story and laugh through the stupid things I did as a kid and a teenager. The main thing I got out of this book was that no matter how shitty your life was as a kid, you can always redeem yourself and become a better person because of it. But also the fact that you can do well in life and succeed to the expectations you had hoped of. I was weary of this novel at first and was wondering what HarperCollins was trying to get me into, but now I am glad because now I have read a wonderful story which has been an inspiration to me and probably many others around the world. I just hope that one day Rosie gets to star in one of her awesome, personally playwritten movie, win an Oscar and give the big, dramatic speech that she always wanted!

Overall I have given this book a 5 out of 5 stars because it was such a powerful book and I think that if more and more people bought and read it, they too would be just as inspired and awe struck as I am after having delved into the brilliantly awesome life of an Anti Cool Girl such as Rosie Waterland.


Thank you HarperCollins New Zealand for the review copy! Go like their Facebook page here: https://www.facebook.com/Harpercollinsnz?fref=ts


Go add The Anti Cool Girl to your Goodreads list HERE


Go buy it on MightyApe with 1 day delivery in New Zealand HERE

Buy it on Book Depository with free shipping world wide HERE



Are you suffering with a mental illness such as depression or anxiety? Here are some helpful links from BetterHelp that you can check out and find tips on how to live a happier life:

BetterHelp Advice - Anxiety
BetterHelp Advice - Depression
How To Deal with Depression: Tips, Techniques And Finding the Right Treatment

How Do I Find A Therapist Near Me?




Sunday, 27 September 2015

Ever wanted to join an awesome YA book club? Now is your chance!

Being a part of the Book Blogger/Booktube community, I've come across a few awesome things in my time being here. As far as book clubs go, I've never thought to join one or even visit one to see what it was like, mainly because of my anxiety and thinking how 'uncool' it sounded.

Until just recently, I found the coolest group on Facebook called the "Perth YA Book Club"! I'm a Kiwi (New Zealander) myself but I instantly found myself immersed in this page and wanting to be a part of it as I read more and more of what everyone was posting and realised how chill and cool it actually was. I feel like this book club is super awesome and everyone is so sweet! They all understand my love for books and authors and events and writing, so I wanted to share them with you all.







Please check both of these awesome links out and let me know what you think! I bet you that you'll fit right in just like I did!

Do you know of any other awesome Book Club or Book Reviewers pages? Let me know in the comments below!


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